have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
