I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
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