suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
