So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
