worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm both gender and math confused
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
