Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize