People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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