Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize
