so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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