we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
