Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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