Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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