the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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