I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
