What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Randomize
