Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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