oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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