I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
