he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
They left me at home... I'm a liability
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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