Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I met the friendliest cop last night
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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