lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
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