I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
