My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
