Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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