do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
