Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
