I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
