I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
