so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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