i already hear my dad disowning me
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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