great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
