I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
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