I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
