Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
