If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Randomize
