He is such a slut. More and more my type.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Randomize
