I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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