Screwed.edu
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize