He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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