I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
