some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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