i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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