We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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