dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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