found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
