i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
You know, be my cock's hype man.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
