I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize