He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
