Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize