Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
