he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
