You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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