Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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